I wrote this poem five years ago, during a time of overwhelming grief. I have never shared it before. I pray these words are a comfort to others who have lost babies they have deeply loved but barely held, or never met. You are not alone.
Still
You’re
slipping
away,
so whisper-soft I barely notice.
Until I do.
It’s the absences,
suddenly present,
sneaking
up on me—
nausea, relenting;
exhaustion, easing;
future, fading—
and I know you’re
slipping
away,
gone,
and I am alone
in this body.
And yet
I still feel you,
tucked safe inside,
your tiny heart beating
like hummingbird wings,
though I never saw it.
They never could find it.
But you know,
and I know,
that you still live
inside me,
and always will,
and it will be our secret
until the day,
together,
we die.
Related posts:
When You Walk Through a Valley
When Being a Grown-up Means You’re Still Growing Up
My book, When God Says, “Wait,” ministers to women who are waiting—including those enduring the painful wait for a child. You can sign up for updates from my ministry here, and purchase the book here.
Share this poem with a friend who needs it:
Brought tears to my eyes….and heart…sweetly remembering our losses!! I’m sure this touched many, many others!!
Thanks, again, for sharing your heart in such a gifted way!!
Thank you, Gloria. I know you understand this kind of loss on a much deeper level than I do. I so admire your faith and courage!
Thank you so much for sharing such an intimate part of yourself. IT spoke to the heartache and the grief I felt losing 3 little ones. But also that as mothers we still carry them with us. Aftee my last loss my 2 year old at the time said…Mommy..your baby is in heaven? After I said yes he looked at me and said…And holding God’s hand. I never did tell him anything about that. I am grateful for God’s comfort and reminders that they are in the best of hands.
Oh, that brings tears to my eyes. What a beautiful image. I’m so sorry for your losses. I know you hold those babies dear. We never forget.